Last Days

written june 2016

I've had this class of students for 4 years in a row

the graduating 8th grade class--3 years in my class for both History and English

Eleven faces stared at me in shock as I read them the letter. It was my smallest section of World History, the first class to hear my letter of resignation.

As I read, I thought about this class, how we had formed a tight bond through inside jokes and shared experiences like Karoake on Field Day or reenactments of legalism or the French Revolution. I thought about how I had seen them grow from unsure 6th graders into passionate 7th graders with a more defined perspective on the world and the relentless drive to make a change. I reflected over our conversations and how they challenged me with explaining the "why" and the mystery of God's sovereign plan throughout history.

The triplets, leaving for Mexico next year

Sweet 8th grade girls

Whether it was daily petitions or praying over the current chaos in the world, they would remind me that God redeems even in the darkest circumstances and is working even when we cannot understand. They reminded me to have faith in a God who is all powerful, doesn't fail, and loves us with an everlasting love.

I loved the students' energy, creative jokes, and how they donned a scarf from my costume box and "became" that historical figure. I loved the way they surprised me one day after a lecture on respect, by serving one another and passing out textbooks, without any prompting.



I loved my crew of student helpers, who worked hard to ensure a clean and organized classroom. And I loved my small group of girls who sacrificed their lunch hour every Monday to meet with me to read and discuss the book of Proverbs. I loved the gentlemen in our chapel small group study that asked honest questions about their faith and spurred one another on to seek Jesus.

6th grade pool party

The students would never know how their hugs or compliments at the door refreshed me or encouraged me before starting class. How their honest inquiry of "How are you, Miss Diaz?" showed me that I could be more than a teacher to them, that they truly cared for me as I did for them.

When my former students came to visit me this year, "just to talk," it was one of those experiences I had looked forward to most and cherished their trust. Some of these students joined my Debate Team or Technology Showcase this year, and I've never felt prouder than when I watched them eloquently present or strategically negotiate for global peace.


As a teacher, mentor, and small group leader, I have walked with this group of secondary students for four full and incredible years at Crossroads Christian Academy. I will forever be grateful to the parents, students, and faculty that taught me more than I could ever teach them.

Now it is time for us to walk in separate directions. Time to discover what God has next and learn to trust him in a whole new way.

****************

God's leading is clear, and, although this step is difficult, I am walking in trust and obedience. I am incredibly grateful for his abundant provision for the coming year! An answer to many months of prayer!

Next year, I will be staying in Panama, but transitioning to teach at a different international school in the fall. I will receive a new group of students, High Schoolers this time, to inspire and pour into. My prayer is to be a light in that school, that God would readily prepare me for conversations about faith and plant questions in the students' hearts as we examine world history together.

Saying goodbye to Room 7

Continue to hold me in your prayers in this new school setting. Hold my future husband in your prayers as he supports me in this job transition and that the Lord continues to lead and direct us both. Pray, as we begin the adventure of marriage in December, that the Lord reveals specific ministry opportunities and unveils how we can best serve Him together.

Faith and Obedience

May 13, 2016

Next Steps: Faith and Obedience

Three months have passed since this out-of-this-world engagement story, and Jovanni and I are still over the moon for each other, while beginning to plan more of the practical details about what a life together will look like.

Getting prayed for by our church after announcing our engagement :)

Meanwhile, I am in the throes of the last month of school, and Jovanni is balancing several responsibilities with a start up business in the area.

To answer your questions, here’s a quick Q and A:

Q: When is the wedding?

We are planning to work on wedding details (like finding the dress!), and celebrate with an “I do BBQ” with my Chico church family. The wedding will be in Panama City, Panama in December; it will be a small outdoor wedding so we’re praying it doesn’t rain!

Q: What are your plans for next year?

Pray for us for wisdom and provision for next year! We plan to remain in Panama after we're married. More updates to come!

Q: Any highlights at Crossroads or in your lives these past few months?

Yes--so much has been happening to praise God for!

-I started sponsoring the Debate Team at Crossroads, and we attended our first competition in April. It was fascinating to sit in the debates and listen in as students shared on topics like the Syrian Refugee Crisis, the post 9/11 world, and creating an economically independent Africa. The students shone in their knowledge of the topics and their ability to collaborate with other country representatives to find solutions. One of our delegates got honorable mention!

-The same week as the two-day debate competition, I took half my 8th grade class to a Technology Showcase hosted by another international school in Panama. Their presentations were impressive, on topics like iMovie tips and tricks, coding, and how to make a hologram. They did a phenomenal job, and I was so proud of their hard work and professionalism!

One of their booths was even featured on the international school website:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rPDicEWOBt0&feature=youtu.be

-I’ve been co-leading a study called Area 51, led by the Crossfire youth pastor, during chapel time this semester. It’s been incredible, because it was all about how we’re “aliens” and foreigners in this world as God’s children. The study was surprising to me, because it was actually all boys and one girl (not pictured). And we had the most fascinating discussions! Jorge, the youth leader, challenged the students the first day to express what doubts they had about God: “I believe in God but….” (“What about the dinosaurs? Why did God create Satan? Why did God put the forbidden fruit in the Garden of Eden in the first place?”) Each session, we explored these and other deep themes that the students were curious about and found answers rooted in Scripture. Our discussions were so intense and profound that we always found ourselves short on time.

It was such a privilege to see these young men speaking out about the truths of God and having the freedom to ask their burning questions. I’m so grateful to Jorge for letting me co-lead this study with him and how he's had these young leaders on his heart; he was even able to address difficult topics like sexual purity and pornography and the importance of surrendering our thoughts and bodies to Christ. Continue to pray for these young men that these truths would take root in their hearts and that Christ would be first and foremost in their lives. That they will be the generation that stands up for what is true and right and be men of integrity and example.

-Jovanni and I volunteer regularly with Pursuit student ministries at Panama International Church. It’s a really tight-knit small group averaging 7-10 students a week, so that’s an incredible privilege to really get to know each student well. Our meetings are bilingual, and Jovanni and I will usually switch off leading the game or giving the message. We both really enjoy youth ministry and serving together, and it’s exciting to see how our strengths complement each other within the context of ministry. We love partnering with our close friends and youth leaders, Eduardo and Clarice, and worship leader friend, Juandi, to foster a loving community for the students.

Keep praying for what this next year holds and all the exciting things God will do as He prepares Jovanni and me to serve Him together!

Pray that we may remained focused on what is most important.

A Date of a Lifetime

The Date of a Lifetime

Who plans a date three months in advance? From December, when he received my father's full approval, to March Jovanni has been planning this romantic, elaborate, and unforgettable proposal:

The Context

Knowing that I might suspect something, Jovanni's been creatively distracting me from the subject of marriage as it would naturally come up in our conversation. After celebrating our 5th monthiversary this March, Jovanni has been saying things like: "we're not ready for marriage" and "we need to wait longer--be patient". So, with those conversations in mind, I've been training myself to be patient. Yet I have still been praying with marriage in mind, while at the same time never thinking that a proposal would happen anytime soon.

However, over the past month, Jovanni's been hinting that he has a pilot friend that wants to offer him a helicopter ride over the city and maybe he could bring me. He told me Thursday that we were going to go on a fancy date on Saturday morning and then on Friday told me that Saturday was the day we were going to go up in the helicopter. I was elated that the opportunity had finally arrived and that I was invited to go! Again, not suspecting a thing!

That Morning


However when the morning of March 19th came to leave on our helicopter tour, Jovanni acted uncertain that he wanted to go. I urged him on saying, "We have to go! This is a once in a lifetime opportunity."

So we met up with Jovanni's pilot friend Ray at a local coffee shop and headed to the hangar together. It was fascinating to see all the helicopters and walk inside this tiny airport that I have driven by often and wondered about.

Our close friend, Luis, came along to narrate and film the journey, and his commentary added a lot of humor to the experience.




After more pictures and getting to know our pilot, Jovanni and I climbed into the back seats of the helicopter behind Captain Ray and Luis. We buckled in and strapped on our headphones/headsets, ready to take off. My excitement trumped any feelings of anxiety and I was grateful for this incredible privilege.

As we ascended into the air, the familiar sites and stores around me began to take on new perspective. Ray acted like our tour guide and pointed out Cerro Ancon, Albrook Mall, Casco Viejo, the Causeway, Panama Viejo, and Costa Del Este. I was intrigued and was trying to take as many pictures as I could. Jovanni helped me change headsets, so we could all communicate over the noise of the helicopter.



 It was a foggy day, but even so, we had the clearest bird's eye view of Panama City. I felt like we were effortlessly floating and gliding through the sky. I looked over at Jovanni and thought how full my heart was at that moment. I loved him, and I was overjoyed and deeply grateful to share this helicopter ride together. A trip we would never 
forget!






Emergency Landing?

I was relishing this peace and continuing to take in the view, when Ray the pilot, commented that one of the emergency lights in the helicopter had turned on and that we would have to find somewhere to land right away. I began to feel a bit nervous for our tiny crew. I started to pray that we would find a safe place to land and that everything would be alright. Everyone was strangely calm in the plane.

Jovanni, noticing my desire to pray, slipped his hand in mine, and, as we prayed, I felt peace again. I was with a talented pilot I could trust, I was with the person I loved the most, and most of all, I was reassured that God had us all in His hands and He was watching over us.

Meanwhile, I scanned the rooftops for  the helipad where I thought we would land. We were rounding the corner of Paitilla, near the Trump tower, and I imagined us being lowered by ropes onto one of the hotel roofs. Just like a spy movie!

The Question and the Answer

But I wasn't paying much attention to what was actually in front of us, and I almost missed it. Jovanni pointed towards the front window of the helicopter.  "Look! Something is happening over there."

I turned in the direction he was pointing and saw a huge pink sign with the words: "Will you marry me?" printed in bold letters. I looked at Jovanni with eyebrows raised, then turned back to read the sign again. I couldn't believe it.



"For me?" I asked, in shock.
Here I was thinking we had to make an emergency landing but instead Jovanni was proposing!
"Yes. Will you marry me?" Jovanni looked at me with so much love in his eyes.



I didn't have to think much for the answer I had been praying months over. But, in the surprise of it all, filled with all range of emotion, I couldn't get the words out. I smiled and nodded yes. We kissed as the helicopter descended to the ground where our closest friends were waiting. I looked back at Jovanni--thinking "This is real. He's going to be my husband." I was completely flabbergasted.

We landed, and I sat there a minute as I watched the moment unfold like a dream. Jovanni hopped calmly out of the plane and walked to the end of the giant sign. With a closer look, I realized that the people holding the sign were our close friends from church. I couldn't have been happier that they were there to witness this and celebrate with us!

I started to step out of the helicopter to join Jovanni, remembering at the last second to take my headset off. I waved and said thank you to our friends who had given up their Saturday morning to be there for us.

Then, all of a sudden, all I saw was Jovanni. He was kneeling on the pavement with an open box in hand. I walked toward him, feeling more confidence and peace with each step. He didn't have to ask the question again. His intention was clear and so was my answer. Bending down, I looked him in the eyes and kissed him. We helped each other stand to our feet, and he slipped the most gorgeous diamond ring on my finger. I told him "yes, a hundred times yes," and we embraced.

Our friends erupted in cheering, and we spent time recounting the story of it all and taking pictures, and I was handed a gorgeous bouquet of tulips-my favorite flower! Even in that moment, I was still shocked every time I looked down at my left hand or looked into the face of the one who would be my husband.

Jovanni is a master planner, and our friends had known the plan for weeks. The proposal was better than I could have ever dreamed; and he caught me completely by surprise!



But there was still the final part of our helicopter tour, so we hugged our friends and climbed back into the tiny, yet thankfully reliable aircraft. Jovanni and I sat side by side holding hands and smiling that his plan was a total success and looking forward to a future together. I began to pray again, a different kind of prayer than before. And I felt the deepest sense of peace and joy from the Lord.

The Prayer

I praised Him for His abundant goodness, His perfect timing and provision. He answered above and beyond my wildest dreams, teaching me what love really means, and He continues to work in unbelievable ways!

As I reflected, the Lord put in my heart one of the promises in Scripture He had given me in my years of waiting and trusting.


Ephesians 3:20-21
20 Now to him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us, 21 to him be glory in the church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, for ever and ever! Amen.

We must hold tight to this promise and not give up hope and not stop working to bring people to know His abundant love. That is our prayer and motive as Jovanni and I prepare for marriage. That we may do more for Christ than we could ever do alone; that we can honor Him through our our resources, our family and our faith in every situation.

We ask you to join us in prayer and may each day count for a lifetime.

December Update

Divine Design: Women's Retreat

From the sharing of testimonies on the car ride there to our fellowship on Sunday morning, every moment of the PAINT (Panama International Church) women's retreat was full of God's presence. Twenty-eight women put their weekend plans on hold and dedicated these two and a half days to worshiping the Lord and encouraging each other in the Spirit and in Truth. The Lord provided generously through the grandmother of a leader in PAINT church to lend us their spacious beach house in Coronado. Complete with several rooms of bunk beds, multiple bathrooms, two large living rooms, and a kitchen/patio area with hammocks and an incredible view, the beach house was the perfect space to meet together as women and commit anew to becoming God's Divine Design.


To go deeper into this topic of "Divine Design," we were led through four different sessions throughout the weekend. We began each session with worship through song and prayer and committing our time to the Lord. This allowed us to be in the right mindset to hear the messages each speaker would bring us. Each session's message was beautifully delivered and full of God's truths that uniquely spoke to each woman there. The speakers had not communicated with each other before the retreat on what exactly they would talk about, but God in His sovereignty tied each theme together like a well-chosen gift.

Clarice spoke first. Clarice and her husband do an outstanding job leading the Pursuit youth ministry at PAINT church, and I looked forward to what she had to say. She spoke on Proverbs 31 and gracefully showed us a perspective that is not often shared in church.

Clarice began by reminding us that we were precious (Proverbs 3:15) and that we were made in His image and He is our potter (Isaiah 64:8). She highlighted the spiritual beauty mentioned in Proverbs 31:30, and then had us look in depth at the story of Abigail in 1 Sam. 25:23-42. One of those stories that, as a church kid, I had heard, but had since forgotten about.:

To summarize, a beautiful, intelligent woman named Abigail was married to an ogre of a man, Nabal, and David (before he was king) sent his men to Nabal to ask for provisions for him and his men. Nabal, being the selfish, foolish man he was and sharing Saul's hatred of David, refused to offer David's servants anything. Shocked by the news that his request to Nabal had been denied, David, in turn, wanted to take vengeance and teach everyone a lesson by killing Nabal and all his household.

By God's grace, one of Nabal's servants overheard the plan and delivered the grim news to Abigail. When Abigail heard of Nabal's refusal and the approaching doom, she did not hesitate to act. She was wise and courageous and sent the largest care package the donkeys could carry and went ahead of the servants herself to meet David on the road and plead for the lives of her family. 

When Abigail met David, she dismounted her donkey and fell facedown before him. "Pardon your servant, my lord, and let me speak to you and hear what your servant has to say.." She came before him with a humble attitude and a rational plea to forgive the foolishness of her husband and not act out in anger, lest he be guilty of needless bloodshed. She affirmed David and prophesied over his future as King. David, appeased by the gifts and her wise and humble words, decided not to carry out with his plan and blessed her for her good judgment. Later, justice was served when Nabal had a heart attack and died, and David asked Abigail to be his wife. She named her firstborn son, Chileab, or Daniel, which means God is my judge.

In our study, Clarice expounded on five characteristics that Abigail's life demonstrated. 1) Intelligent, 2) Humble, 3) Responsible, 4) Servant-Minded, and 5) Had a Cheerful Heart. We looked at these characteristics in more detail through a word-association activity where we had to use these words/phrases to summarize what each of these characteristics really meant and how to apply them in our lives.

As women, we talked about these lessons late into the night, the next day and the next. We shared personal testimonies of God's faithfulness and redemption in our lives. And it was the greatest encouragement to know we're not alone in this journey with Christ. Saturday night, we joined hands and prayed together aloud in the power of Jesus' name to answer different requests, interceding on behalf of family, friends, the church body and our larger Panama City community.

Three more messages were shared during the retreat. Each one powerful and encouraging us to unite as women in prayer and to remind each other of our true identity in Christ.
Here are some memorable quotes from our time together:

Orar Conmigo

Mi oracion ya ha sido traduciendo en espanol! Gracias a Steve McCune de Crossroads Connections por la traduccion! 

Amado Jesús,

Hoy trazo un círculo alrededor de los estudiantes de la Academia Cristiana de Crossroads.

Te alabo, porque ya estás formando las vidas de los estudiantes de CCA para ser administradores misionales de Tu Palabra para que puedan ser testigos Tuyos por todas partes.

Señor, Te pido que cada estudiante que pase por las puertas de CCA se acerque más a Ti. Revélales La Buena Nueva y dales un corazón comprensivo para entender quien Tú Eres y cuánto los quieres. Te pido que esta relación contigo transforme todo lo que hagan y que sus familias lleguen a conocerte también.

Haz crecer estos jóvenes. Que sean fuertes exploradores que presenten La Verdad y vivan piadosamente. Enséñales a usar sus dones con la cosmovisión del Reino y a vivir con integridad y pureza. Ponga a fuertes hombres cristianos en sus vidas que puedan servir como hombres guías a través de su peregrinaje al mostrarles cómo arraigarse en Tu Palabra. Recuérdales que su identidad no hace en sus reputaciones ni en sus hazañas, sino en Él que sirven.

Y Señor, bendice a estas jóvenes con discernimiento, gentileza, y gracia. Enséñales a guardar sus corazones sin levantar muros y así establecer fronteras que no se cruzan sino solo por invitación. Anímalas a reflejarte a Ti y bendícelas con otras mujeres desarrolladas para alentarlas con La Verdad y estimularlas a buscar la belleza espiritual. Enséñales a estas jóvenes a someterse a Tu voluntad, para ver las oportunidades de inspirar y servir en palabras y en obras. Afírmales que su identidad no es la popularidad ni las apariencias, sino solo Tú. Que sean adoradoras Tuyas.

Te alabo Señor, sabiendo que de estos jóvenes hombres y mujeres Tú forjarás embajadores atrevidos que sirven. Ellos irán contra la marea por Ti, Señor, amando a sus enemigos, tomando el tiempo de amar a los que son difíciles de amar, dando generosamente, perseverando en oración con diligencia, y siendo responsables y respetuosos. Guarda sus palabras y sus acciones en las redes sociales y rodéalos con influencias Cristo-céntricas. Renueva sus mentes para que puedan someter cada pensamiento a la guía y la filtración protectora del Espíritu Santo. Enséñales las salidas de emergencia para huir de la tentación y guíalos en los caminos de Tu justicia para honrar Tu Nombre.

Vela por ellos. Protégelos. Enséñales cómo amarte y vivir cada día por Ti. Todos intercedemos por los estudiantes de CCA con divina anticipación por lo que Tú vas a hacer en ellos y por ellos.

En Tu Nombre Todopoderoso, Jesús. Amén.

Join Me

School Theme for the Year: Romans 12:2 "Upstream"

My school, Crossroads Christian Academy, just finished our first full week of school! It was full and good, and, at the same time exhausting, since we're all getting used to the school schedule again. I was praying this morning for the school and was reminded of all of the answers to prayer that the Crossfire team experienced in Ecuador. We prayed specifically for different situations and circumstances to line up, and God answered above and beyond for His glory!

So now, I'm inviting you to join me in a prayer I've been praying daily for the students at CCA:


Dear Jesus,
Today I draw a Circle around the students at Crossroads Christian Academy.
I praise You, because You are already shaping the students at CCA into mission-minded stewards of your Word so that they can be witnesses for You far and wide.

Lord, I pray for each and every one of the students who pass through the doors of CCA that you would draw them close to You. Give them a revelation of the Gospel and a heart to understand who You are and how much You love them. I pray that this relationship with You transforms everything they do and their families come to know You.

Grow these young men into strong, courageous adventurers who are not afraid to stand for the Truth and lead godly lives. Teach them how to use their gifts, how to work with a Kingdom mindset, and how to live lives of integrity and purity. Place strong Christian men in their lives who can serve as role models and mentors along the journey and root them deeply in your Word. Remind these young men that their identity is not found in their reputation or what they do, but rather in Whom they serve.

And Lord, bless these young women with discernment, gentleness, and grace. Teach them what it means to guard their heart but not put up walls, to set boundaries but also invite others in. Place in each of them a yearning to reflect you and bless them with godly older women to mentor them, speak refreshing truth into their lives and encourage them to seek after spiritual beauty. Teach these young women to be fully surrendered to your will, to see opportunities to serve and to be an encouragement through their words and actions. Assure them that their identity is not in their popularity or the way they look, rather in Who they look to. Give them a desire to worship.

I praise you, Lord, because You are going to mold both these young men and women into bold ambassadors and servant-minded young adults. They will be "non-conformists" for you, Lord--loving their enemies, taking time for those the world labels as "unlovable," giving generously, persevering with prayer and diligence, being responsible and respectful. Guard their words and actions on social media and surround them with Christ-like influences. Renew their minds so that they submit and filter their thoughts through the Holy Spirit's guidance. Show them the paths you provide to flee temptation and guide them in paths of righteousness for your name's sake.

Watch over them and protect them. Teach them what it means to love You and live for You daily.
We pray all this with holy anticipation for what you're going to do in and through the students of Crossroads Christan Academy.

In your all powerful name, Jesus,
Amen.

My original 7th graders, now in 10th grade!

Some of the CCA students on Field Day, 2015

View of Panama City from Ancon Hill