La Ampliacion: Part 1

These pictures, not to mention experiences, almost never happened!

Following the Chame youth group retreat, Esther and I booked it over to the Panama Canal expansion (on the Pacific side). For two years now, we've felt the explosions of the dynamite to make this structure, and we desperately wanted to check out the almost-finished product. Not only that, but Esther had informed me that for one day only, the Canal Expansion was going to be open to the Public. You would be able to walk right through the canal locks!!

Esther masterfully navigated (thanks to Pills' directions) to the parking lot in Panama Pacifica, and we loaded onto a bus from there. Now, out of the masses of people that were there, it "just so happened" that the Fernandez family from CCA (I have two of their boys in my classes) was on our same bus! What a fun surprise!

The Wait

We followed their lead in joining the enormous line snaking through the bus stop parking lot. The line led to a ramp that led to another set of buses that would take people over to the canal expansion.

Kathy Fernandez told me that this was actually their second time trying to get into the locks that day. They actually had to go home and change shoes. No sandals were allowed!

I looked down at my feet. I only had the versatile footwear I had used for retreat, my very sturdy Keens. Even so, Esther walked between me and the police officers who were sending people out of the line because of dress violations or having too young of kids to visit a construction site.

We had almost made it up the ramp, and I was getting pretty excited about the whole venture. In my mind, it felt like I was going on a Disney Ride, where you stand in line for an hour to experience the magic, yet I knew that this experience would be even better. This would be walking through a once-in-a-lifetime part of history! Once the locks were filled, you wouldn't be able to walk through them again!

Denied

As I near the crest of the ramp, the revolving turnstile entrance in plain view, a stern police officer says to me, "No chancletas" (No sandals.) And he motions to me to step out of the line. There are masses of people, and the look on his face tells me that he's not one to be argued with. Mr. Fernandez sees what happened and turns and throws me his keys, saying, "There's boots in my truck you can use!" How generous!

I clutch the keys, wondering how I'll ever find his car in the parking lot where there was such little space that we had to park on the grass. Sadly, I move out of line.

I tell Esther to go ahead. This is her dream, so she should go walk the locks without me. She's upset too, since we planned on sharing this trip together, but the rush of people are pushing her along, and she waves goodbye and disappears into the masses.

As I stand there contemplating whether to get the boots, Kathy calls over to me. "Laura!"
A huge sense of relief floods over me. Kathy, her little 5 year old son, and her friend were also pulled out of line, because her son was too young. I had people I knew still around, and that was a huge comfort.

We stand beside the line, and she tells me the size of the boots. They'd be too small, so we decide to just pass the time and catch up on her recent trip to the States. Meanwhile, we're watching the line pass us by and wondering how long it will be until we reunite with the others after their tour.

Our conversation is interrupted by a lady police officer, "Estan juntos?" ("Are you together?")

We look at each other and agree, "Si."

"Go ahead." She says in English.

"Wait..what??" I wonder aloud, surprised by this sudden change of mind.

The woman police officer had mercy on us and explained that I should just make sure to step carefully, and the little boy could go if he met the height requirement.

I was filled with elation. I would get to walk the expansion after all! We stride confidently toward the turnstile entrance. But my dreams are almost crushed a second time, as that same police officer says, "No. No pase." I flag down the merciful lady from earlier, who vouches for us, and gives us the right to pass to the other side.

Such undeserved grace! As I pass through the turnstile, a huge smile on my face, greeters hand me a Panama flag and a map of the locks. "Bienvenidos!"

I sprint toward the coach bus brimming with people and find my way to the last empty seat. I had made it. Now if I could only find Esther..

To be continued in: La Ampliacion: Part 2

The coach buses dropping off and picking up hundreds of visitors for this special one-day event. You can see it's somewhat flooded, so that must be why they didn't want anyone with sandals.

Where the canal doors will go (MASSIVE)

No special event in Panama is complete without the local music!

I've never been to the grand canyon, but I imagine it feels somewhat like walking through here.

There were all sorts of Patriotic things to do: Take a picture with the sign! #idontknowthesepeople

Take a picture inside a twitter sign and they'll post it on the site. There was a LONG line to do this.

They gave you all sorts of facts on the tour. None people would really remember, but once they did compare a measurement to how many bowls of rice that would be. LOL.

This is where the doors will go. Fortunately there was a little bridge over this part for the buses to pass.

Here's those facts you've been waiting for:

La Ampliacion: Part 2

These friendly volunteers handed out ice-cold water bottles to every visitor and were much obliged to take a photo with me.

Part 2, continued from Part 1

Like I said, it was a reminder of God's total undeserved grace getting to pass through the inspection and enter the canal locks. I tried to text Esther on the bus with an excited message, "They let me in!" and a plan to reunite afterward. But, possibly due to the other hundreds of people trying to access the data, my phone message would not go through. 

"Okay Lord," I silently prayed, looking out the window at the view of the construction. "You've brought me this far. Now, if it's your will, please please help me find Esther."

I knew it was a long shot, especially when we stepped off the bus, and there was such a large crowd of people that people were barely moving! Cheers rang out from a team of volunteers wearing "Soy Parte de La Historia" t-shirts. I really did feel like I was experiencing an unforgettable part of history!

I meandered through the crowd, enjoying the sights and joining others in gawking at the enormity and immensity of the project. I couldn't imagine how big the ships would be that would pass through this space. An incredible accomplishment, and this was built and owned by Panama!

Making my way around the coned off area, I glanced to my left. There was a crowd of maybe a hundred-or so people in just that small area, and I thought maybe they were looking at something. Turns out, they were only heading towards the exit, but couldn't move any faster, because there were so many people. I scanned the crowd, hoping against all hope that I would catch a glimpse of Esther.

Suddenly, I saw her. But not only did I see her, but she saw me, and she was waving at me!!

My eyes widened in shock, and I whooped for joy! She couldn't believe it either, and I signaled above the crowd, "I'll meet you over there!" pointing to a somewhat less crowded space on her side.

"What are the odds of finding Esther in such a massive amount of people??" I wondered as I slid by the multitudes of people with selfie sticks and Panama flags. 

"Well, you did ask me.." I imagined God gently tapping my shoulder as a reminder, "I'm here, and I'm all powerful. Why did you doubt?"

"Oh yeah.." I chuckled to myself, brimming with such undescribable joy. My God answers prayer! This was no mere coincidence. 

I made my way over to Esther, and we gave each other a huge hug. We started laughing, "I can't believe we found each other!" we said almost simultaneously agreeing.

And, of course, who should be coming over the bridge right behind us, but the Fernandez family. They had all made it as well! We made sure to take photo together, thanking God the whole time!

The tour concluded with a bus ride up to see the view from above, but I just couldn't get over the fact that Esther and I found each other! We stood admiring the view, but most of all, admiring the work of a loving and omnipotent God who answers prayer in personal and miraculous ways!

James 5:16b-18
"The prayer of righteous person is powerful and effective. Elijah was a human being, even as we are. He prayed earnestly that it would not rain and it did not rain on the land for three and half years. Again he prayed, and the heavens gave rain, and the earth produced its crops."

Chame Retreat 2015

Loading hula hoops and soccer balls into the trunk of my car, I prayed "for protection, for a fun time, and for honest conversations" for the weekend. I watched as over 100 students 6th-12th grade loaded onto two coach buses toting their sleeping bags and pillows. We were heading out for my first ever Chame youth group retreat, and I knew we were about to enter into a battle only God could win.

Thanks to Brennan's driving skills, with only one mandatory stop at Quesos Chela, we arrived safe and sound to the Chame Palabra de Vida (Word of Life) campground. I was amazed at the beauty of this part of Panama. I had been to the Palabra de Vida grounds before and heard of God's ministry through the Delibasich family and their volunteers. However, I had never stayed the night in the cabins or really explored the campus. 

I looked out over the vast terrain: soccer field, basketball court, pool, 4-5 cabins up the hill, an area for fogata (bonfire), a sheltered stage area with a kitchen attached. What a privilege it was to join together with 4 other churches in Panama, look out to the mountains, sing worship songs together, and remember our God!

Throughout the weekend, there were many sweet and hilarious moments:

• Playing fun variations of Capture the Flag 
• 1. With a Watermelon: When it broke, all the kids rushed to eat it!
• 2. At Night: We used glow sticks to designate teams and a large glow stick inside a clear, plastic soda bottle for the flags. It was mass chaos, as people chased each other across the field, not knowing for sure if someone was on their team, since many used "decoy" glow sticks to lure the other team into a trap. It was pretty funny to not see anything, than suddenly you see this floating, glowing bottle bobbing up and down the field super fast, illuminating a leg here or there and hearing the shouts of victory as the other team brought the "flag" successfully across to their side. My team lost pretty badly, but it was a game to remember for sure!
• Smashing "mystery sauce" pies into kids' faces in the Yes/No Game
• Super thankful to have some of the high school upperclassmen involved--they made the game 10x more entertaining, because they would throw the questions back at me or change the subject in a creative way. Even my lovely assistant got pied!
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• Having a conversation with a leader who I thought had just gotten proposed to
• Turns out, it was only her Quincenera ring worn on the left hand!
• Trying to balance and watching others attempt to balance on Brennan's slackline
• one of my friends was able to do it! impressive!
• Meeting leaders and students from different churches in Panama City
• Amazing to be part of God's larger story for reaching the youth of Panama for Christ!
• Rally Games
• Part of the sessions were a series of stations where each team (randomly chosen) had 15 minutes to complete a task
• Your team had to do everything from running dipped sponges up the hill from the pool to fill up a bucket to navigating a maze with your whole team tied together. It was a privilege to watch as the team cheered each other on and followed John's clear leadership. #go_green_team
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• Bonfire time
• The Fogata was so raging hot that no one wanted to get near to make the S'mores, so we just passed out all the ingredients afterward and the students still loved it!
• Had an awesome, honest talk with a girl in my small group for the weekend, named Nicole. She shared how she first came to know Christ when she was 9 years old through attending a similar Chame retreat. This time, she was recommitting her life to Him, to serve Him through thick and thin. Wow!

Zoom In

Unlike my talented brother and sister-in-law, I don't have the gift for photography or even naturally spotting the details, but I will do my best to capture some word pictures to allow you to see what the retreat taught me.

1. Humility

Being a leader for the retreat, I had different duties and responsibilities to fulfill during the weekend. It is easy for me to get in "servant" mode, and not spend as much time with the students, which is of FAR more importance in the long run. Well, this weekend, I got an equal dose of both!

Whenever I went to prepare a game/activity or help clean up something, there was a small crew of middle schoolers who came over and asked if I needed help. And letting go of this control over the activities/details, I felt more peace, could relax and enjoy just being with them. Not only that, but we had a blast working together! We were able to laugh at and with each other as we squirted strange-colored concoctions into tinfoil to-go boxes for the Yes/No game or as we picked up trash off the field. Not to mention my small group girls (freshmen and sophomores) I was extremely humbled and grateful to everyone who led by example and helped out during the weekend.

2. Vulnerability/Tell your story!

One of the most beautiful parts of the weekend was that my close friends, Danae and Paulo (engaged to be married: July 2015!), were the retreat speakers. To know them both, is to know that they have undergone incredible transformation and growth in Jesus in the past three years of knowing each other. And, unlike, typical retreat speakers, they're willing to admit publicly that they're not perfect. 

Yes, the theme/message of the retreat was on the Unity of the Church through loving God and loving people, but Paulo and Danae shared with us much more than the cookie-cutter salvation message. They were real, and they made the Truth real.

Paulo and Danae started off by saying something to the effect of "We are a mess. In fact, everyone is. But God loves that mess. He made you, and sees a masterpiece in you." After they said this, I noticed a collective sense of relief pass through the students. These people are going to be honest. I can trust them.

Within the next three sessions, Paulo and Danae each laid bare their soul and shared about their personal journeys with Jesus. Their testimonies were raw, gripping, and vulnerable. It reminded me of God's power to rescue us from desperate situations, anger, bitterness, perfectionism, and self loathing.

Jesus rescues us from addictions to porn, struggles with lust, and the need to bully others, and replaces them with a new spirit, a new person. A person who is so consumed with Jesus that he gives his thoughts over to Him, who is overcome with God's love and this pours out of his soul to foster life-giving relationships, other-centered decisions, and an ability to love fully, comfort others, and be merciful in all circumstances.

God rescues us from perfectionism, a striving to achieve more and do better than everyone else. He rescues us from a competitive nature that pushes us toward the World's temporary pleasures in order to feel accepted and popular and rescues us from the need to feel in control of a life that is slowly crumbling around us. A time when we stop eating, hating ourselves, pushing outwards on the pillars of our life to hold them up, but the pressure and the weight of the problem is increasing, and your arms no longer have the strength.

Jesus rescues! He pulls us out from the rubble and places us in a safe place with walls and a foundation that will neither crumble nor fall. He replaces that desire to control with an unyielding trust in Him. He replaces that fight to belong, that self-loathing and struggle with comparison with the words, "You're mine." He replaces those temporary pleasures with an enduring truth, a satisfaction that lasts.

Jesus affirms our true identity and destroys the Deceiver's strongholds and lies!

Because.. He loves us.

And we are His Masterpiece.

Thank you so much Danae and Paulo for humbling yourselves and sharing these truths with us this weekend! Thank you to George for the vision and for your leadership in uniting the youth groups of Panama City to share in this experience. For these messages are truths that will last much longer than a day and a half retreat. These truths and stories will transform lives!!

Restored: Girls' Retreat

As the girls and I sat in the living room and sang, "Oh How He Loves Us," I felt overwhelming joy to see this vision become a reality: All these girls, 6th-12th grade, gathered together in one room worshiping our Creator and learning alongside each other the truth of our identity in Christ.


Arise and Go

"Restored," the much-prayed-about theme of the Crossfire Girls' Retreat kicked off with our visionary and leader, Esther Brunat, speaking on Micah 2:10: "Arise and go, for this is no place to rest, because of uncleanness that destroys with a grievous destruction." Esther highlighted God's commandment to "Arise and go." She explained how there is a physical, mental, emotional or spiritual place in all of us where we don't want to be, that is unclean or leads to destruction. She shared that our thought-life, especially as women, is where our battles are fought and won. We have maybe a 5-second window for when thoughts enter our mind. We can either let the unhelpful/destructive thought (ie: of comparison, or lust or jealousy) capture us and lead us away into sin, or we can take that thought captive to Christ and ask Him to fill us with His truth.

Esther continued to reveal truth to us through God's Word:
In Haggai, God promised that the "latter will be greater than the former,":

"The glory of this present house will be greater than the glory of the former house,' says the LORD Almighty. 'And in this place I will grant peace,' declares the LORD Almighty." Haggai 2:9

We are not meant to rest or make our home in these "former" places, but God wants to deliver us. God promises to replace fear with love, anxiety with peace, and insecurity with assurance.

After this talk, each girl had a thirty-minute "God-time," where she found somewhere on the premises to spend time talking one-on-one with Jesus honestly about this topic. For each girl, this served as a special and powerful time, as the Lord revealed important, life-changing truths and next steps toward that transformation God desired.


R & R

Interspersed between these more serious sessions of spiritual self-examination and growth were times of relaxing in the pool, jumping on the trampoline, playing soccer/basketball, or taking a stroll on the beach. We were incredibly grateful for the generosity of the family in the church who

lent us the beach house and acted as our hosts for the weekend. I couldn't imagine a more ideal setting to contemplate God's restoration and beauty.

Best Yes
In the afternoons, we split up into "Break-Out Sessions," where different leaders had the chance to speak from their heart and life experience to smaller groups of girls. The topics covered everything from: "The Father's Heart," to "Courage," "Comparison," and "Self-Worth."


I had it on my heart to share about a book I read recently, called The Best Yes, by Lisa Terkeurst. The book is about how to make Godly decisions and make time to slow down to listen to Him to find the best decisions for our lives. The ironic thing about my talk though was I almost completely missed my session! Due to a mix up in the schedule, I started my session late, and all the girls had already gone to other break-out sessions. I was so discouraged! Here, I wanted to share about these important, life-changing truths, and there was no one to share it with.

Fortunately,  a small group of leaders (my friends) hung around and came to my shortened session. I was appreciative to them for coming, and we actually had a good discussion around the topic of making big life decisions. One student arrived about half-way through, as she had walked up from the beach in the rain, and had almost missed the session as well.

I shared what God had taught me through the author's words and prayed that somehow God would use this. In my heart of hearts, I prayed that maybe I'd get another opportunity to share with the rest of the girls.

Afterwards we shared a community-style lunch and, later, split into small groups that were just assigned for this retreat weekend. I was relieved to learn that the girls in my group were all native English speakers, because this meant I could be more open with them. They could share from their heart in their heart language, and I would understand it fully. (Normally, my Crossfire freshman/sophomore girls small group is a combination of English and Spanish speakers, and my co-leader and I are constantly translating back and forth. It works, and I end up learning a lot from these girls.)

As I looked around at the girls in my small group (for just this weekend), I was excited to learn that these four girls were 8th-12th grade girls that I had had multiple chances beforehand to pour into, and ones that I thought specifically about when I was preparing to share the lessons in the Best Yes book. Now we got the opportunity to talk and be real with each other about decisions we were wrestling with, and I was impressed how the junior/senior girls shared about their experiences with decision making, in relation to college and summer jobs. Though I didn't deserve it, God had redeemed this time and given me another outlet in which to share!

Lies About God

That same night, after dinner, we all reunited downstairs for Lisa's talk. Lisa is a woman of God that I highly admire; she is incredibly sensitive to the work of the Holy Spirit and allows God to speak truths from His Word through her. Needless to say, I was already hyped up about all that God was doing that weekend, and sat on the edge of my seat, ready to take in whatever truths would be spoken that night.

As the sun set, and it got increasingly darker in the room, I heard whispers about how the generator was broken, and Lisa addressed these concerns by giving them to God and declaring His power over our circumstances. But the lights stayed off.

Despite having to hold her iPhone in one hand as a flashlight to read her notes, Lisa spoke boldly and had her mind set on the task at hand. The main point of her talk was the challenge to reflect upon what lies we were currently believing about God and ask God to get rid of these lies and fill our hearts with His Truth.

The Bucket
 
As the mom of four, she compared these lies to old, broken toys that she made her kids put in the "throw-away" bucket. She said we needed to put these lies in the bucket and throw them away, so that God could "renew our minds." (Romans 12:2), and transform us, often by fire (Job 28:5). We need only to recognize the Truth of who God is and what Jesus is offering us (everything). When we begin to know and declare these Truths, our relationship with God is restored, and we can enter into close communion with Him.

God is not like the over-tired parent who gets weary of hearing about or helping us with "petty" problems. The Truth is that it brings God great pleasure to work in us. Philippians 2:13 says: "For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him." 

The Lullaby

In fact in Zephaniah 3:17, it says:

"The LORD your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing."

Personally, when I read this verse, I like to think of God whistling happily as He chisels away at our lives, making us more and more into the image of Christ. Or maybe He's humming a comforting melody as He reaches down to pull us up out of the same hole we've fallen into time and time again. He gently instructs us about the better path and guides us to step boldly in the way He has prepared.

Lisa compared it to a father singing sweet lullabies over his baby, swelling with pride and bursting with love at the thought of this little one made in their image. The baby is soothed by the Father's singing. "You're beautiful. You're precious. You're mine."

The Light

Lisa closed her talk and gave an invitation for girls to come up and pray with different leaders around the room. During the invitation she said, "And you don't have to feel ashamed about coming up for prayer, because the lights are still out."

She was about to say something else, when there was a loud clicking noise, and the generator kicked in and light flooded the room.

Blinking in astonishment, I smiled and almost starting laughing in surprise at what the Lord had done. A mini-miracle! The lights were back!

My friend, Erica, elbowed me with a chuckle saying, "God has such a good sense of humor!"

I couldn't agree more. In the moment we were trying to hide, He turned on the lights: there would be no shame anymore. Jesus is the light. Darkness does not understand the light and cannot overcome it! This Light permeates every dusty crevice of our hearts, the parts we want to hide or cover up with lies, illuminating the truth and allowing us to clearly see the path ahead.

Afterwards

This tangible sign of God's intervention and answer to prayer really shifted the girls' perspective and remained the topic of discussion all that night and later on into the week. What was it again about lies we believed about God?: Is He Enough? Is He all Loving? Is He caring enough to be there in the details, the specifics, the mundane areas of our life, like the lights not working? Is He all powerful? Can we trust Him?

Continue to pray that these girls' lives would be restored, filled with the truth of knowing Christ as their personal Savior and what difference this makes in their lives. Pray that they would continually be seeking out the heart of Jesus and take time to spend time with Him daily and listen to Him and His reassuring song of love over them.

Verses for the Road

 

Rest at Rock River

Thursday, April 9th, 2015

 Today was full and glorious! I had an unforgettable time with friends exploring God’s creation, and then capped this with a hilarious community dinner/game time in the evening.

The Deal of a Lifetime

I subscribe to a local website that offers incredible deals on businesses and services in Panama. Just a few weeks ago, we scored a canopy and river tubing tour in Colon for under half the original price! We were pumped and waited for the opportunity to use this oferta. When we learned that schools all throughout Panama City would be closed on Thursday and Friday because of the Summit of the Americas, we knew we had found the perfect date to go on this adventure!

Providentially, we left Panama around 9:45a and arrived at the Panama Adventures tour headquarters in just a little under an hour and a half. That's pretty incredible timing when you think of crossing the isthmus from Pacific to Atlantic/Caribbean oceans. Along the drive, it was pouring rain, which is completely uncharacteristic of the sunny dry season we’ve been having. I prayed the rain would stop as I weaved my way through the road blocks along the highway. The road blocks were all red and white striped, and I joked that we were passing through the candy cane forest (“Elf” connection anyone?). Taking the Sabanitas exit, we turned right at the Rey on the main road and took another right, headed along the same road to Portobelo. With the rain and some confusing website directions, we got a little turned around, but eventually saw the landmark beach "Maria Chiquita," and, a little while further on our right,  the sign for "Panama Adventures."

Jungle Chicken

The “road” turn-off to reach Panama Adventures was not really a road at all, but rather a very rocky path full of potholes and puddles. We slowly bumped along, and I hummed the “Indiana Jones” theme song. If only I had four-wheel drive. We passed occasional houses with horses walking freely about, and people sitting on the front porch watching as these strangers drove by. Brennan pointed out the “jungle chicken,” and, knowing his scientific knowledge of birds, I slowed the car further to look around for this special chicken. The others in the car started laughing, and I realized I was looking at a regular chicken, just one that happened to roam the jungle! Hilarious!

A taxi going the opposite direction pointed us toward the correct fork in the “road,” and after a series of hill-climbing and pothole-dodging feats, we pulled into a flat, grassy area with a bohio and one man sitting with a stack of forms. I breathed a prayer of thanks—we had made it safely without popping a tire and, not only that, but the clouds had parted and the sun shone right through. Also, because of the “candy cane forest” detour and getting gas along the way, we had been running late, so we had felt the pressure to get there quickly. However, when we arrived, we were told to wait for 45 minutes for the next tour. Whew! We wouldn’t miss the tour at all.

The Tour Begins

Fortunately this 45 minutes actually turned into 10 minutes as the guide walked us around the premise, showing us the hiking trail, the river where we’d use the inner tubes, and where the surprisingly nice bathrooms were. We “signed our lives away” on the liability forms, and then headed up the super steep road to the zipline area.

Because Becca and Renee aren’t proficient in Spanish yet, Brennan translated the life-saving instructions of the guide, as he showed us how to sit properly in the zipline harness and, most importantly, how to brake. For me, this was my third time ziplining, and, after overcoming the initial fear of the unfamiliar, I've loved the pseudo-flying experience every time. For Brennan, Becca, and Renee, it was their first time! But we were all giddy with adrenaline and ready to go.

We waited anxiously at the bottom of the platform steps watching as, one by one, each person launched out onto the course. Everyone went until it was just Renee and me waiting for our turn.

Then, out of nowhere, a swarm of large blue hornets surrounded Renee and me. I swatted them off, and the hornets came back with a vengeance. We ran away from this area, but some had gotten trapped in Renee’s helmet, and they stung her on her cheek and shoulder. We were pretty shaken.

Renee was up next to go on the zipline. The guide made sure she was okay and not allergic after this completely unexpected, painful incident, but this definitely affected our perspective of the first few zipline runs, and I can't even imagine what thoughts were going on in Renee's mind as she held her throbbing cheek in one hand and gripped the zipline cord in the other. Standing a little distance away (far from the hornets), I prayed for healing and peace. 

On Top of the World

On about the 4^th or 5^th run across, we started to laugh and enjoy the canopy experience again, trying to block out the freaky hornet attack from earlier. We stood reunited on a platform lodged into a giant tree overlooking the forest around us. Yellow-orange flowers dotted the tops of the branches, and we could see the peaks of some of the nearby mountains. Having the assurance of my caribiner and trusting the guides completely, I had no fear. Yet, I could still sense some anxiety in the group brewing just below the surface. The group was on a high alert and, a few of us, were extra jumpy around the large bugs climbing the very tree trunks we were hooked onto for safety. Rest would not come so easily.

In contrast, the guides had done the zipline course hundreds of times, so when they went across, they seemed completely carefree, pulling all sorts of daring stunts, like going upside down and spinning at the same time. Becca was courageous enough to try going upside down, while I learned how to let go of the rope awhile and see the jungle from a different angle. The experienced guides captured some amazing photos and video of our expressions while sliding across the canopy cables.

River Tubing 

After this adventure, a family who ziplined with us offered Renee some afterbite cream, and we all had some time to rest and let our stomachs settle. Then, two of our guides (Jose and Olmedo) told us to grab an inner tube and head down to the river. Rio Piedra (Rock River) has a very calm current with small sections of rapids and sandy banks that are easily accessible. We floated along, lettting the current carry us, admiring the unique trees of the jungle all around. Our guide, Jose, even pointed out a gorgeous red flower that only blooms during the month of April (el flor de crucero).

The water was still and quiet, and, lying back in my inner tube, I contemplated the part of Psalm 23 where this promise is found: “He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters. He restores my soul." (vs. 2-3a). 

In fact the only time we had to strain at all, was when going over the tiny rapids. We had to remember to prop our bodies higher in the tube, because it was dry season, and these were very shallow parts with lots of rocks. After one of these more turbulent sections, we floated into a much deeper part of the river. I closed my eyes a minute, taking in the serenity of the moment. I again prayed "peace" over the day and tried to let go of my own agenda and fully trust Him.

Rope Swing

My thoughts were interrupted by an exciting observation. “Look!” Renee tapped my inner tube, and motioned to a nearby hill where there was a long rope hanging from the trees with a wooden handle bar. All of us looked at each other with wide eyes of anticipation. The guide calmly explained that we would beach our tubes here, and people who wanted to, could climb up the side and use the rope to swing into the river. Everybody ended up doing it, even the two elementary kids who were also on our tour. Thankful for encouraging friends and the adrenaline still coursing through my veins from the zipline adventure, I followed them up the hill, excited for this new experience.

Brennan went before me and easily swung out over the river and dropped down naturally into its depths. My turn was next. The view was different from up here, and reality hit me. I was about to do this. I whispered a prayer as I saw the rope hurtle back towards me. "I need Your peace, Jesus." In the midst of turmoil, in the midst of our weakness, Jesus makes Himself the most apparent. He holds us in His strong arms.

“Okay guys, I need a 1-2-3, if I’m going to do this.”

I grabbed a hold of the wooden handle, leaned back, and on “3,” tucked my legs up and swung. I cleared the rocks and now the river was far below me. “Let go! Let go!” the group yelled from the side. The pendulum swing had reached its furthest extent.

I pried my fingers lose and began to fall. I closed my eyes, screamed, then remembered to close my mouth so I wouldn’t swallow water. Splash! The impact was smoother than expected, and using the buoyancy of my Keens I pushed myself to the surface, whooping and cheering and laughing all at the same time. What thrilling fun that was; how abundantly joyful I felt, bursting to the surface with a newfound glow in my cheeks. 

The peace I felt in that moment overwhelmed me. I floated on my back and looked back at the rope swing. This "swinging into action," this exertion of energy to triumph over a fear and take the leap was somewhat exhausting, yet energizing at the same time. My body felt recharged, capable of much more than I had thought it was moments ago. I felt stronger, not because of my ability to jump, but, because I knew that it was only through Jesus' power and strength helping me conquer my fears that allowed me to take the step off the ledge and later let go of the rope. 

The Return

I ended up doing the rope swing three times, along with the others, and then we spent time relaxing and swimming around the river, talking with the guides about nearby sites and what life was like if you made your home on its banks. 

Eventually, the conversation found it's natural lull, and we all came to sit on the water’s edge. “Es tiempo de regresar,” Jose said, picking up his inner tube and wanting us to follow his lead. I had the feeling that I never wanted to leave that calm, clear river pool; for there, I had felt overwhelming delight and profound peace. Shouldering our inner tubes, we reluctantly trudged back to the main bohio area. This time, we took a shorter route, through the jungle. With quiet, gentle steps, we took in the sights, avoided crushing the leaf cutter ants on their determined trail, and contemplated all we had done in the past three hours.

After thanking our guides, I had a minute to sit and process in the car before we continued our drive out to Portobelo to see the ruins of old Spanish forts. God had given me some edge-of-your-seat thrilling experiences this week, followed by times of deep relaxation and appreciation of His creation. After working hard, whether through physical or mental exertion, these times of rest seemed much sweeter, much deeper. 

R & R

To relax implies trust that God will do what He says He’ll do, that He is in control and is the Master Provider. Relax literally means “to become less firm;” and, in the same way, God is shaping our lives as we give more control over to Him and rest in His promises. In return, He fills us with his peace and gives us a larger picture of His sovereignty. We can come to Him and surrender our worries, recuperate, and find renewal in the assurance of our true purpose and identity.

After arriving home safely to Clayton, I couldn't get the picture of ultimate rest out of my mind. I began to look up Scripture and came across a Biblical commentary website that mentioned an old hymn. The hymn not only speaks perfectly about rest, but also uses the metaphor of a river!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bnIcKms_IUY “Like a River Glorious”

Read the story behind the hymn here.

Some Scripture for your journey:

Matthew 11:28-30

28 "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.

29 Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 

30 For my yoke is easy and my burden is light."

Psalm 23

1 The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want. 

2 He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, 

3 he restores my soul. He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake. 

4 Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me. 

5 You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows. 

6 Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.

Psalm 91:1

Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High
    will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.