Just one of many favorite conversations during
the weekend:
I noticed
one middle school boy lingering by the cross after the Saturday night
“surrender” service. The students had split up into his small groups, but yet
he had stayed behind. This student and I have had multiple conversations about
life and God this year, and he is one of my faithful Roots Bible Study members.
I came
and knelt across from him, the cross on the floor lying between us. “What’s
up?” I asked him, eying the slip of paper he was holding. The paper was still
attached with a nail to the cross.
“I’m
thinking of taking it off.” He said, as he twisted the paper around the nail.
“Why?” I
inquired.
“I’m not
ready to surrender this. I just feel like I’m not good enough, like I’ve not
been following God and I don’t think He’ll take it.” He gazed mournfully down
at the cross. “I mean, what if He won’t forgive me?”
I
processed his words and prayed for the wisdom to answer with God’s truth.
“First of
all, he will forgive you, and it’s okay if you’re not ready to surrender it.
Leave it here as a reminder to you that you want to surrender, as a first step
in giving it to God. Everyday, you will probably face the same sin/temptation,
and you will have to make a conscious choice again to surrender it to God and
follow Him instead.
Second of
all, you’re right. You’re not good enough; in fact, none of us are. That’s why
Jesus had to die on the cross, because there is no way we ourselves could earn
our way to Heaven; it is only through Jesus that we can have forgiveness for
our sins and He can cleanse us from all unrighteousness. That is His promise to us. That if we go to Him, He
will forgive us, no matter what. Then we can have a right relationship with
Him.”
“But I’m
always making the wrong choices..” The student was still dwelling on his sin.
“And God
forgives you and will help you obey Him. Think about Jonah.
God called him to go preach to the wicked city of Nineveh, but instead of
going, Jonah takes the first ship out of Joppa (the complete opposite
direction) and tried to run away. Of course, God knew all along and sent a
storm to turn the ship around. The ship’s crew threw Jonah overboard, but God,
in his mercy, spared disobedient Jonah’s life by providing a huge fish to
swallow him. Jonah spent 3 days and 3 nights in the belly of the fish, and
cried out to God for rescue. His heart was changed, and he praised God for
saving Him from the bottom of the ocean. God still had a plan for Jonah and had
the fish vomit him onto dry land.
So then
Jonah finally goes to Nineveh. He preaches like God told him to, and
surprisingly, the Ninevites repent and turn back to following God first. But
instead of being overjoyed for them, he throws this big temper tantrum in front
of the Lord, saying that his compassion for them was undeserved. God has to
teach him a major lesson about attitude and circumstance.
Jonah
literally ran away from God, then threw a hissy-fit when things didn’t go the
way he wanted. Yet, God still used him to reach a people group that needed to
hear about God’s truth and good plan for their lives. Jesus even compares
himself to Jonah in Matthew
12, in that he was in the belly of the fish for 3 days and Jesus would be
in the tomb for three days, before his resurrection.”
This
middle school boy and I talked a little while longer about what he was
wrestling with and his feelings of loneliness, and as I struggled with how to respond
to this boy’s heavy heart, God filled my mind with scripture verses to share
with him and assure him. God keeps His promises, and sharing these truths
ministered to my soul as well, as I reflected on the specific instances when
God rescued me or taught me similar lessons about His constant presence and
peace.
Like
Jonah, we pray:
“In my distress I called to
the Lord,
and he answered me.
From deep in the realm of the dead I called for
help,
and you listened to my cry…Salvation comes from the Lord.” (Jonah 2:1,9)
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